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My Autistic son and how we are going to reach him
Three point five years ago, Logan was born prematurely, he scared me out of my whits! I remember racing to the hospital doing a speed > the speed limit. I don't remember arriving at the car park, only the birthing suite, I burst in to the entrance... The lady said. "Mother and baby haven't been very well, I will take you through in a moment".
I remember the feeling, then thinking, oh god I have lost them, We walked into the hospital together laughing and I will be leaving on my own...
She's taking me in, down some small corridor that felt 10 miles long, I'm crying now as I write this, as I always do... thinking about this moment, I heard something, it grew louder, we want through the double doors. Like a freight train just plowed through my chest, I heard it again, it sounded like a duck! 🦆 it was my son! Me being late as usual, I had missed the birth - shouldn't have taken that shower before I left!
I spent 2 weeks in hospital visiting every day- my girlfriend the hero of this story was suffering, she's not aloud to see him for a few days! I'm his sole carer for the time being, what the hell am I doing, this baby is now in a glass House, I have to step up!
I drive home late, living off junk, energy drinks and Costa coffee.
Finally the day comes, I show my girlfriend what I have learned, how we feed him through a tube up his nose, change him and bath him. Her parents come... Mine, well its personal but I don't have any, not a typical childhood, it's me, I learn to be a dad from this day forward.
Logan was Two when I started to look forward to having conversations, little questions to answer and hearing his voice, then one day he said "doggie", our dog Lizzie the jack, she brought out his first word 👏👏
But then, nothing
Other children, friends of ours, Thier kids all now walking and talking, Logan finally decided to start cruising, one a 2 months later, he walks! It took a while and this is expected, the impact of prematurity is bigger than I had ever understood or anticipated.
He doesn't speak again for at-least six months, he knows maybe 10 words now, we read every night, 3 books a night. It's hard not to compare, we are desperately worried now, he can't or won't talk, our friends kids, full sentences and back chat!
COVID hits, everyone in doors, we spend a long time indoors, he is regressing again, we need to do something fast, we learn British sign language from books from Amazon, everything comes from Amazon now, welcome to the desert that is our house.
He's three now, and we have a few words he finally starts answering questions with no, not grunts... Although I'm now fluent in grunts, we sign around the house, even talk to eachother like this, it's easier for us. A very useful fascinating langue system you should absolutely learn by the way!
Today we try PECS it's a system of communication similar to a Jira board.
3 columns, now, next and later
You stick your pictograms describing an activity to the column, he sees pictures and understands the plan. We think he has autism but it's a really long process in the UK to find out.. We know he hates change.
So to help us all out, we have purchased a pecs board 🤘
It sucks... It works but it sucks because we need more columns sometimes, less sometimes, different pictures. And when he's screaming the house down, we need favourite pictures quick sharp. Lastly like all things of this nature, it's badly drawn, as a UI guy this triggers me... We need an app, there is an app for everything right?
Wrong, I think I need to write one, maybe it will help parents all over the place?
So that's the plan, like many of my plans they never finish. I need a way to make this quick, get it out the door and onto an app store, I know web tech, what should I choose?
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